What will people do in self-driving autonomous cars?

On assignment for a major media company, I interviewed experts on autonomous cars what will the future look like. There is a lot of imagining going. A new “mobility services market” will be worth well over US$1 trillion globally by 2030, according to KPMG.  A study by Strategy Analytics paid for by Intel predicts $7 trillion by 2050 in revenues from mobility services.

After seeing the hype and the profitability motive, I put my imagination to work to conjure up what services will be offered besides just getting from point A to B.

We know that there will be some kind of payment method in order to pay for this new mobility this opens up an opportunity to sell many things to the customer.

My first thought was you could have a mini bar like they have in hotels. You don’t have to stop at a convenience store to get a bottle of water for a dollar if you remove the bottle of water from the minibar in the self driving car you get charged two bucks.

The idea I had back in November, has already come into fruition, well sort of. It’s not refrigerated but Cargo places mini vending machines with app to enable passengers with snacks and essentials in Uber and Lyft cars. Food and water are basic needs that often drive sales and services. After nutrition comes, work and entertainment. In 2016, Harman announced that it is working with Microsoft for Cortana and Skype in vehicles. Since we already have Slingblox video in vehicles such as the Ford Expedition, we can assume there will definitely be some kind of video to watch. Those kind of services are so old-school, what will creative minds create in the future of autonomous vehicles?

Geo-Located Advertising & Advice?

In order to drive themselves, the vehicles have to super computers. Google knows your browsing history and maybe you will give you advertising when you are near Target it will show you some kind of special at Target. Google knows from your browsing history that you were looking to buy a new cell phone and that Target has great deal on cell phones right now. So you see an ad with coupon for a very good deal on a cell phone.

But what I’m more interested in the more personal, valuable kinds of services that you could offer, when the rider/passenger needs a little help dealing with life’s conundrums.

Since we have a super computer that drives the car and that talks, it could offer therapy sessions—–

“How are you feeling today?” Dr. Ann Lexa asks.

“Mmm, I’m listening,” she assures.

“Really, why  do you think are you creating that in your life?” the sweet motherly robo-shrink will ask.

Money Over Mind Over Matter Over Body Over Weight?

These cars have AI and will be predictive. When I enter the mobile service vehicle it scans my finger and it knows from my web history and that I like to meditate. The lights turn all kind of mushy purple and I receive a guided meditation for relaxation for only $10.50.

From my mobile payment statement it knows that I go to the gym. It seems to me a waste of time to go to the gym, in the mobilized future, when I can order the FitPrime car than has bicycle pedals, Pilates pulls, weights and a treadmill.

While I’m commuting to work I can burn off 384 calories.There are two options for my FitPrime Car, I can have a virtual trainer who will yell at me to pedal faster, faster…faster! OR— for $95 an hour an actual human arrives in the vehicle and my personal trainer tells me which weights to lift.

The FitPrime car measures my improvement because built into the self-driving car is a scale. To motivate me to lose weight that my rides are based on how much I weigh, if I lose 10 pounds I will save $0.10 a mile!

What’s App Doc?

In the app world, we see services where therapists, doctors, hairdressers and other personal services come to your home or office. With the driverless car I can order a car and lo and behold there’s a doctor there who will provide a physical exam. She tells me to “Get more exercise.” Dr. Driverless inputs my data to the medical cloud. I get an electrocardiogram and a mammogram while commuting to work.

So, say I don’t believe in traditional medicine. Well, I ordered the Massagistic Ride. The seat reclines back and I get a full body massage from the car itself for $1.00 per mile or from a human being for $10.00 per mile. The suspension in the car has been specifically designed to simulate the motion of a baby in the womb, for maximum coddling.

Fit for Fido, Fifi & Me-Me

I like to take Fiifi my adorable poodle with me in my self-driving car. You’ve heard about mobile dog grooming. When I scan the mobile bar code, I can get the Dog-Groom-O-Matic mobility car.

While on my way to work, my puppy’s personal dog groomer will provide a quick bath and a coiffure with oatmeal shampoo and aroma-therapy mist along with a pet-icure.

While Fifi is having her hair done. My chair turns around and I get a manicure and my makeup done on my way to work. After it drops me off, the autonomous car takes Fifi t doggie daycare and will pick her up before it picks me up because I need quality time with my dog on the way home.

On the way home, I video chat with my friends, while Fifi walks on her own personal doggie treadmill.


In some states recreational marijuana is legal. It safer to have the driverless car drive the stoners. That’s why we’’ll have competing companies Mary Jane Xpress,  Dubie-Dubie Dash and GangaGoGo.

Privacy Security & Sex Tapes?

Since there is no driver, there is no need for clear glass to see out for people on the outside to see you inside. There will be privacy shades. The driverless car will be a great place for romantic rendezvous and hookups. But what the customers will not know is that these cars will be equipped with interior 360-degree surround view cameras.

Mobility service providers have to monetize not just the ride but other services. Upon disembarking from the LuvCar, you will be given a price quote. You can receive your sex video for one price or your video can be sold on the open market (especially good if you do it with a celebrity) in which the mobility company gets a cut. An other option is for the video to be shared on your social media feeds. The shy modesty mobility package includes destruction of private parts data and an added security package.

There has been a lot of hype about autonomous self-driving driverless car technology companies that stand to make a lot of money. They claim that there will be no accidents. That’s why they will have to sell birth control.